Rainy Day Mind Games

Quote of the day: “Heaven opened and the water hammered down, reviving the reluctant old well, greenmossing the pigless pigsty, carpet bombing still, tea-colored puddles the way memory bombs still, tea-colored minds.” ― Arundhati Roy, The God of Small Things

Rain falls – grass gets even greener

The first day of the rain I laughed and was thankful to be indoors where I was warm and dry. I remarked on how lucky it was that the moisture falling from the sky was not snow and remembered to tell myself, “April showers bring May flowers.”

Watching the ducks gather beside the pond, I wondered if they felt no need to swim in the pond because the rain was drenching them where they stood. I went to a movie with a friend and read books in the evening, feeling that it was a perfect day for both.

The second day straight day of rain I no longer laughed at the rain. Shivering, I wished for a sliver of sunshine. I noticed that the ducks had disappeared from the pond. Not only were they not swimming in the pond as they have been for days, they weren’t even hanging out at the edge like teenagers waiting for someone to pair up with. Where do ducks go when it rains?

The old saying “April showers bring May flowers,” had become mildly annoying. And the sound of the rain on the roof reminded me of the rain falling on the tin-roofed buildings in Hawaii during day and night-long deluges during the rainy season. I began to get a little grumpy.

The third straight day of rain with gray skies shrouding the day in gloom and snowflakes mixing with the rain, I started wondering if I could put on my rain gear and boots, and protect my camera enough to go out into the woods and make photos. I decided I’d better wait until the rain let up for awhile and then go out. The rain never seemed to let up.

I went back to the ranunculus flower that I bought last week and made still more photographs of it. Finally in the afternoon I declared, “I’m tired of making photos of this dX!m flower!” I paced the house with restlessness, unable to find anything that I wanted to do. Thankfully no one tried to tell me, “April showers bring May flowers.”

Photoshop Play

This is the way my mind works after a long winter indoors when I’m longing to go for walks in the woods, take my bike out for a ride, and make photos of early spring wild flowers—I cling to what I want and strongly push away what I don’t want—but my aversion to the rain and longing for the sun does not change what is.

The weather is what it is. I have no control over it. But I can work with my mind.

I Can Practice Presence and Acceptance

Stopping what I’m doing, I go to my meditation chair, sit, and remember to be present to what is and to allow everything to just be, breathing in compassion for myself and everyone who has been affected by the long spell of wet weather, breathing out gratitude for all the blessings in my life.

Breathe in. Breathe out. Breathe in. Breathe out.

Cultivate compassion and acceptance.

The bands of contraction inside slowly me let go. My mind relaxes into equinamity.

And I go back to my flowers and make more photos – playing with color, movement, and light, asking myself to see them differently, using camera movement and zoom to do studies of colors,light, shapes, and textures.

Acceptance of cold, gray rainy late April days. Acceptance of all of the feelings I have about the weather. Acceptance of what is.

Here are some flower photos to brighten your day. May you walk in beauty.