I was taking a walk with my daughter today when I found myself telling her about some of my recent struggles I’ve had choosing love over fear. Though I’ve walked this path before I find I re-visit it frequently with much pain when I forget to choose love over fear. We ended our conversation by saying…
Each of Us is a Work in Progress
Yup. That’s life and this is me in all my humanness — a work in progress.
If we’re lucky we keep growing and learning throughout our lives. And sometimes we repeat lessons we’ve learned before, diving deeper into the truth with each repeat.
I don’t know about you but when I get stuck in fear reactions, I move into control mode, trying to control another person’s behavior or my own to avoid whatever it is that I fear. It’s painful living in control mode and also narrow and constricting; never mind that trying to control life is futile.
The Illusion of Control
I truly believe that “being in control” is one of the biggest illusions of modern life. Just when I think I have everything figured out I am reminded that life is uncertain, nothing lasts forever, and we are all mortal.
I Worried
I worried a lot. Will the garden grow, will the rivers
flow in the right direction, will the earth turn
as it was taught, and if not how shall
I correct it?
Was I right, was I wrong, will I be forgiven,
can I do better?
Will I ever be able to sing, even the sparrows
can do it and I am, well,
hopeless.
Is my eyesight fading or am I just imagining it,
am I going to get rheumatism,
lockjaw, dementia?
Finally, I saw that worrying had come to nothing.
And gave it up. And took my old body
and went out into the morning,
and sang.—Mary Oliver
Eventually when I realize that I’m trying to control things because I am afraid, I can seek to once again choose love, gratitude, and appreciation, and let go of fears and worries. When I move into love and appreciation I also move into more of an opening and flow rather than being constricted and tight. And should I become forgetful, my body tells me which state I am predominantly living in.
Which are you choosing my friends, love or fear? And which do you want to choose this week? Remember that each of us is a work in progress. Wishing you a love, gratitude and joy-filled week.
May you walk in beauty.
0 Comments