Garden Therapy

My garden – two cherry tomato plants, 4 kale plants, 4 cucumber plants, 2 parsley plants, 4 varieties of lettuce, and sugar snap peas

Yesterday in between appreciating the beauty of the day and soaking up all the green I had a several not-so-little private tantrums about life during COVID-19. My day started beautifully with me full of wonder and appreciation for all the green around me despite the gray skies above.

Then I went to a garden store to buy vegetable plants and flowers and while I was there I had an internal tantrum. “What’s up with all of the customers and employees who don’t wear masks, maintain proper social distance, and wear their masks below their noses?” I silently fume. Don’t they realize that wearing a mask shows consideration and respect for the health and well-being of others? Aren’t they taking this pandemic seriously? Grump, grump, grump.

I was still in a grumpy mood when I got back home. (And Jon was in my direct line of fire.) Fortunately I realized that I was being unreasonable and that I was feeling out of sorts.

I decided that what I needed was some

Garden Therapy

Putting my hands in the dirt always calms me down. Garden therapy is the cheapest therapy I can think of, next to dancing in the living room or singing in the rain.

“It was such a pleasure to sink one’s hands into the warm earth, to feel at one’s fingertips the possibilities of the new season.”
― Kate Morton, The Forgotten Garden

Since it was lightly raining when I came home I waited and watched for the rain to stop. When I saw that the driveway was beginning to dry off I donned my gardening gloves and grabbed my garden spade and headed outside to plant the vegetables and flowers I had purchased at the garden store.  As soon as I began digging in the dirt, raindrops fell once again.

The rain gave me time to pause and consider my foul mood and look inside for what was really going on.

I came back inside and sat down and simply noticed what I was thinking and feeling. I realized that putting on my mask and going to the store had caused a great deal of stress for me. Instead of being present and simply noticing the stress and accepting it or working to release it, I ignored it. Over time I became more agitated as I encountered more and more people shopping in the confined aisles of the outdoor and indoor spaces at the garden store.

Eye-opening to become aware of my stress

It was eye-opening to notice how stressed I had become. Considering the circumstances, the media coverage of the virus, and everything else, perhaps it’s understandable. Given the fear-based news all around and my tendency towards high anxiety, it’s natural.

But I don’t want to live in fear of coming into contact with strangers. I don’t want to become so stressed by seeing someone without a mask that I start judging them as being inconsiderate and selfish. And I really don’t want to start restricting my life more and more because of internal fear and stress.

Most of all I don’t want to become upset with others for living their lives the way that they believe is best. The judgment slope is a slippery slope. First I make assumptions about someone wearing or not wearing a mask. Then I make other assumptions based upon how someone looks to me or on old programs that I learned in childhood. That type of behavior does not end well.

How I combat my fears and stress

One of the most powerful tools to combat judgment, anxiety, and fear for me, is to take time to become present and mindful. If I slow down, notice what’s happening in my body, and pay attention to my ever-changing thoughts I begin to come into the present moment. When I take the time to actually experience my feelings, they usually dissipate. But when I don’t take that time to become present my feelings hijack me and send me down a steep slope of deepening stress and anxiety.

I see myself cultivating my mind like I cultivate my garden. Only I get to decide what nutrients I take in. And if something turns out to be non-nutritious for my soul, I eliminate that source if I can.

“When people will not weed their own minds, they are apt to be overrun by nettles.”
― Horace Walpole

Cultivating my soul

Recently when I became aware of how all the news media coverage of the virus tended to increase my fear I began limiting how much news I read and listened to. I’ve even started limiting how much attention I pay to all of those well-meaning people who are posting webinars and articles to help me become more resilient and handle my stress “during these unprecedented times”. (I recognize the irony right now that I’m writing a blog post about all of this. But I’m trying to keep it personal. These are my experiences and feelings and I’m working hard to not give advice or spout Pollyanna-ish platitudes.)

In this moment, everything is all right in my life and I have everything I need. My pause to become mindful helped me make conscious choices to nourish hope and beauty rather than sink into fear and anxiety.

After the rain stopped I headed back to my garden for some much needed garden therapy.

How are you doing these days my friends? What stresses you most? Where do you find peace and comfort? Are you in need of some garden therapy or out in nature time?

May you walk in beauty.

A friend sent me this link and watching it made me smile and cry at the same time. Perhaps it will speak to you as well: https://joshspector.com/now-this-is-a-great-commercial/

A rose plant at the garden store that I would have brought home if I had a place to plant it

One of the flower plants I planted in front of our house (after the rain)

Sugar snap pea plant. I planted the seeds in mid-April

Russian Red Kale plant that I planted yesterday

Leaf lettuce mix that I planted mid-April. I planted 4 different varieties of leaf lettuce this year. I foresee salad days ahead.

Hummingbirds love this flower

The peony buds are emerging!