Slow Down and Savor

Morning Pond Magic — Cottonwood “Snow” and Ghostly Green Reflections

After a very busy month of May our planned home improvement projects are mostly done or on hold until later. Spring has rapidly morphed into early summer with lush greens everywhere I look.

Slow Down and Savor

I have been wanting to slow down and savor every moment of this glorious time of year. The beauty of it all fills me to overflowing with feelings of appreciation, wonder, and gratitude. Though the sweet smelling lilacs and other early blooming flowers are done blooming, there is still so much beauty everywhere.

I’ve had a checklist of things that I needed to do before hip replacement surgery and I’ve slowly been checking them off. This week I made a big batch of beef bone broth to sip after surgery (who else besides me doesn’t like hospital food?). We’ve been cleaning house and clearing out clutter so it will be easier for me to get around.

At the same time I’m loving the fresh bright greens everywhere I look. The leaves are full out now but still fresh and bright and new. Later in the summer they will look a bit more dull and tattered but right now electric green is the color of the week.

A simple dandelion flower — but look at how beautiful it is!

Take the Back Roads

My slowing down and savoring has included avoiding the freeways whenever I can when I’m out and about. Taking the back roads and streets is so much more relaxing even if it takes a little longer.

Another way I slow down and savor is by listening to music. Here’s a tune from my favorite duo when I was in high school.

Feelin’ Groovy

Slow down, you move too fast
You got to make the morning last
Just kicking down the cobblestones
Looking for fun and feeling groovy
Ba da-da da-da da-da, feeling groovy

Hello lamppost, what’cha knowing
I’ve come to watch your flowers growin’
Ain’t you got no rhymes for me?
Doo-ait-n-doo-doo, feeling groovy
Ba da-da da-da da-da, feeling groovy

I got no deeds to do, no promises to keep
I’m dappled and drowsy and ready to sleep
Let the morningtime drop all its petals on me
Life, I love you, all is groovy

Songwriter: Paul Simon

[kad_youtube url=”https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TBQxG0Z72qM” width=600 height=400 maxwidth=800 ]

Sometimes my laid back attitude has caused embarrassing moments though. Earlier this week I did my weekly grocery shopping at the food coop. Usually I carry out my bags of groceries myself but I decided to drive up since I had a lot of heavy stuff to carry. I took the plastic number that identified the cart with my groceries and got in my car. As I sat thinking about what route I might take home, I forgot all about picking up my groceries. Just as I put the car in reverse to back out of my parking space I had a niggling feeling that I had forgotten something. I paused for a moment but could think of nothing and feeling the back roads calling me, I headed for home.

I took a very relaxing drive home reveling in the beauty all around me, parked the car in my driveway, and looked over to grab my purse. There was the plastic number sitting on my car seat and of course no groceries in sight.

Abstract Pond Art

Stay awake

Sheepishly I returned to the food coop, drove up to the grocery pickup area and handed the plastic number to the clerk, saying, “I forget and drove off without my groceries.” She smiled and said, “No worries,” and headed in to get my groceries. I saw her looking all around and then disappearing from sight. Soon another clerk came out and said, “Sorry, but we put your groceries in someone else’s car. They’re driving to bring them back right now.” After a few minute wait another car drove up to the grocery pickup area.

A very irate woman got out of her car and shepherded my bags of groceries from the trunk of her car into the clerk’s hands. The clerk deposited the bags in my car. I said, “Thank you,” and quietly drove away, feeling terribly stupid and silly. All the way home I struggled with the mean stories I was telling myself about my forgetfulness. Fear about dementia, berating myself for not paying attention, wondering if I should share the story with others or keep it to myself.

Fortunately, I realized that I’d gone down a negative rabbit hole with my mean stories and was able to laugh at my fears and foibles.

Be Human

When I returned home I intentionally told Jon of my two trips to the Food Coop (and the reason for them). We laughed together about the memory lapses we experience getting older.

I remember an incident that occurred with my mother-in-law (one of my favorite people ever) when she was the elder and I was a youngish mother. I was meeting her at a local store to pick up my daughter who had been staying with her. We met in front of the store where she had just been shopping and walked back to her car to get my daughter’s things. The car was running when we got there. I could tell that she was embarrassed about walking off leaving the car running but I didn’t know what to say to ease her embarrassment so I said nothing. Now I wish I had laughed with her about how easy it was to forget little things like that.

We are all human and we all make mistakes, forget things, fail, and muck up more often than we would like. This is the nature of life. I think living with grace is learning to live generously and compassionately with human fallibility.

The choice we have is how we treat ourselves when we make a mistake or fail. With the help of a regular meditation practice I am more and more able to recognize when I’m telling myself a mean story and interrupt to replace it with intentional self-compassion.

How about you? What stories have you told yourself recently? Is it time to slow down and savor? Is it time to practice self-compassion?

May you walk in beauty.