Today I went to the Minnesota Landscape Arboretum to make photographs. And I found a kind of quiet joy waking up in my soul, the longer I spent in the beauty and nature of that lovely place. And I realized that I had been feeling a kind of low-level grief about life and everything after the loss of my beloved cat and a dear friend. Part of me felt like giving up and giving in to thoughts like, “This might be as good as it gets,” or “It’s all downhill from here.” I even wished that I could leave this life before losing any more loved ones (not right away, mind you, just before any other losses occur).
Somehow, as I gazed at the unusual February landscape through the lens of my camera I suddenly felt a truth in my bones. That truth is, that wherever I go
They Travel With Me.
The fact that my cat Gracie and my friend were a part of my life and enriched my life so much was a gift beyond measure. You may think that I denigrate my friend by comparing the grief I felt for her passing with the grief I felt losing my beloved pet. But I think that love is love. It can be as deep and meaningful with a pet as with a dear friend or companion through life.
Praise the Rain
Praise the rain; the seagull diveThe curl of plant, the raven talk—Praise the hurt, the house slackThe stand of trees, the dignity—Praise the dark, the moon cradleThe sky fall, the bear sleep—Praise the mist, the warrior nameThe earth eclipse, the fired leap—Praise the backwards, upward skyThe baby cry, the spirit food—Praise canoe, the fish rushThe hole for frog, the upside-down—Praise the day, the cloud cupThe mind flat, forget it all—
Praise crazy. Praise sad.Praise the path on which we’re led.Praise the roads on earth and water.Praise the eater and the eaten.Praise beginnings; praise the end.Praise the song and praise the singer.
Praise the rain; it brings more rain.Praise the rain; it brings more rain.— Joy Harjo
Feelings of sadness come and go. One doesn’t just “get over it” once and for all. But joy can live comfortably in the midst of sorrow. For me, seeing the cycles of life lived out in nature helps greatly. And seeing the beauty of nature lifts me up. Even looking out my window right now and seeing light snow fall and begin to cover the grass and trees in the backyard is uplifting.
It’s important to take time to do what you love. The voices of loved ones who have gone ahead live on in my memories. I like to think that loved ones who have gone before are everywhere all around us, in the graceful curve of a leaf, shooting across the sky like the contrail of a jet, nestled in the grass like a seed waiting for spring. They travel with me wherever I go. Like the memory of raindrops on the ocean dissolving into the sea, they are part of everything.
Wishing those who are grieving moments of joy and beauty, laughter, happy memories, and the knowledge that wherever you go they are with you.
May you walk in beauty.
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