Quick, before thinking, “For God’s sake this is October. Couldn’t the snow wait until at least November?” Or thinking “Damn, snow already. I hate it!”
How about noticing the wonder that surrounds you, the beauty of fresh snow, the wonder of living in a snow globe for a few hours yesterday. Bear witness to this incredible world and all of its beauty.
Life Happens, Choose Joy
First Snow
The snow
began here
this morning and all day
continued, its white
rhetoric everywhere
calling us back to why, how,
whence such beauty and what
the meaning; such
an oracular fever! flowing
past windows, an energy it seemed
would never ebb, never settle
less than lovely! and only now,
deep into night,
it has finally ended.
The silence
is immense,
and the heavens still hold
a million candles, nowhere
the familiar things:
stars, the moon,
the darkness we expect
and nightly turn from. Trees
glitter like castles
of ribbons, the broad fields
smolder with light, a passing
creekbed lies
heaped with shining hills;
and though the questions
that have assailed us all day
remain — not a single
answer has been found —
walking out now
into the silence and the light
under the trees,
and through the fields,
feels like one.~Mary Oliver~
excerpted from American Primitive
We don’t get to choose what happens around us, especially the weather (unless we move). But we do get to choose our response to weather and life as it happens.
In my dreams last night (though taking place in a different life story) the snow that had fallen during the day in my dream completely melted overnight and the world looked fresh and new. Waking up this morning to see all of the snow still on the ground and a skim of ice on the pond was a great disappointment.
Wishful dreams
Reality
And dreaming about snow last night revealed how deeply I don’t want snow now, in October, to last. I vividly remember the Halloween blizzard in 1991 and how winter arrived and didn’t leave again until spring. Winters are long in Minnesota without early starts so I understand cabin fever only too well. Then add in COVID-19 and how it has impacted our daily lives. And there’s not question about it…
It’s hard right now
I get it. It’s possibly been one of the worst years of your life so far. There’s the craziness of a world gone mad it seems. And COVID on your mind, with no end in sight, and no idea when, how, or if it will end. You’ve been cooped up at home or taking distanced walks, wearing a mask in public, missing hugging and being close to friends, worrying about the elections, sad about climate change, and wondering what’s going to happen to our country, the world, nature, your job, and your own family. You’re Zoomed out and running low on energy. And now on top of all that it appears that winter is arriving early.
Maybe it’s time to zoom in
So maybe you need to grumble, grouch, growl, cry, or howl before you can notice the beauty of this moment. If you need to, then do what you need to do, feel what you’re feeling (unless of course you’re in the grocery store and you don’t want to frighten the other shoppers there). Once you’ve expressed your emotion, take a moment to be still. Notice your thoughts. Are they joyful thoughts? Or hopeful thoughts? Or thankful thoughts?
Probably not. That little hamster wheel in your mind tends to spin the same old thoughts over and over again. Maybe it’s time to simply say, “Thank you for sharing that with me. Now I am going to find something to be joyful about,” to your hamster thoughts and worries and then take a moment to notice your in breath and your out breath.
“Breathing in, I calm body and mind. Breathing out, I smile. Dwelling in the present moment I know this is the only moment.”
Choose Joy, Wonder, Gratitude
Pretend you’re someone who has never experienced snow before and look out the window. Doesn’t it fill you with wonder? When I look for it I find the beauty. But when I run old thoughts and scripts about how I hate winter, guess what? I hate winter.
God knows, winter is my least favorite season of the year. And this year with the possibility that we won’t be gathering with our children and grandchildren for Thanksgiving and Christmas feels pretty darn bleak.
This winter I plan to work hard to find some kind of joy, wonder, or gratitude every single day. I also plan to create watercolor paintings or photographs every single day. Otherwise I don’t know how I’ll survive it sanely. Seriously. That’s my plan, my whole plan. It may not seem like much, but it’s all I’ve got.
What about you? Is the early snowfall getting you down? Can you choose joy anyway, at least for a moment or two?
May you walk in beauty.
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