In a fiction book that I was reading this week, one of the characters in the book, referred to as the “old lady” was said to be 66 years old. The author portrayed the character as sometimes using a cane and taking morning naps in the garden. Though in the end this wily “old lady” was central to the book’s plot. It turned out that she had all of the younger people fooled and was miles ahead of them in cunning and wisdom.
When am I old?
At first I was quite insulted that the lady in the book was thought of as old and feeble when in fact I don’t think of myself, at age 66 (almost 67) as particularly old or feeble. By the end of the book I was no longer feeling insulted by being called an old lady at age 66.
This got me thinking about age. When am I old? Jon and I joke that old is a lot older now than it was when we were younger. When I was forty years old, the age of sixty-six did seem old to me.
What’s the big deal about age and getting older? Yes, I sometimes wish that my body felt and looked like it did when I was younger. But frankly, I’ve dealt with pain issues for so long that things don’t feel much different for me now than when I was younger.
The biggest difference is that I’m no longer searching for the magic bullet that will heal all that ails me. And the older I get the more I accept the glorious perfectly imperfect being that I am.
We have a cultural aversion to aging in our society. Elders are often not revered or respected. In fact, they are often ignored and denigrated. Yet elders are capable of so much and give so much back to all of us.
More tree practice
I watch Ruth Vader Ginsberg with awe. She just keeps on doing what she believes is important, brushing aside health challenges. I would love to be half as tough as she is. And talk about tough, Nancy Pelosi at age 79 could probably out-pace me at a lot of things, especially toughness. My favorite meditation teacher, Tara Brach, is the same age as I am. I look at what she continues to do to spread the message of mindfulness and compassion and I wonder if I’m doing enough.
Then I think about my belief that when I follow my joy I am doing my most important work.
Age brings freedom
I wouldn’t go back in time to a younger age if I could because I’m much happier now than I was when I was younger. Today I’ve decided to think of myself as an elder, not someone who is old. Elders are held in respect. They give back to family and community some of the wisdom that they have learned through hard-earned lessons in the school of life.
For me age has brought a freedom that I treasure. I no longer need to worry about furthering my career and I can indulge in doing what I love. This is a privilege that I give thanks for every day. Not everyone is so lucky. Had I loved computer engineering as well as I love photography and painting I would still be writing software code. But though I enjoyed my work as a software engineer, it was never my passion. I was fortunate that the work I did and my life circumstances allowed me to essentially retire in my late fifties.
Here I am, coming up on ten years of studying and practicing photography and I still love it today as much as I did when I began, and perhaps even more. This is a blessing that I give thanks for every day. It is a rare day that I don’t pick up my camera at least once to photograph something beautiful that has caught my eye.
My love for photography has given me the confidence and freedom to explore my love for art.
This week I’ve been working on lessons in painting trees in my online watercolor classes. I’ve also taken walks, read books, written blog posts, made photographs, and played with cyanotype images. Life is good.
Embracing Age
Yes I am aging. We all are. Maybe I’m old in some people’s eyes. I’m fine with that. This life I am living is a gift. Each second, minute, hour, and day is a gift. None of us know how many days we have remaining.
I understand a lot more about “being old” than I did just 10 years ago. This is a time of exploration for me after a lifetime of hard work. And it is also a time of great happiness.
I hope that you too enjoy your stage in life, whatever it is. And that you give some thought to the question, “When am I old?” and what that question really means to you.
May you walk in beauty.
0 Comments