Quote of the day: “Paradise was always over there, a day’s sail away. But it’s a funny thing, escapism. You can go far and wide and you can keep moving on and on through places and years, but you never escape your own life. I, finally, knew where my life belonged. Home.”
― J. Maarten Troost, Getting Stoned with Savages: A Trip Through the Islands of Fiji and Vanuatu
Lei hung on a tree at Laupahoehoe Point
I’ve decided that I’m almost “done” with this adventure/journey/sabbatical or whatever you want to call it, and booked my plane ticket home. I am missing my sweet spouse and home and Gracie the cat. As it begins to sink in that next week I will be winging my way home, I find myself going there in my mind already.
And in complete contrast to my mind straying back to Minnesota before my body does, I’ve also been feeling the most amazing appreciation for the beauty and warmth and tropical scent of each moment here. I think to myself, “This may be the last time I’m here,” and I become totally present, at least for a few moments.
Crashing Waves at Laupahoehoe Point
These two totally contrasting behaviors got me to thinking about how much of what I experience is in my mind. By clinging or judging I create my own personal “hell” and by being totally accepting and present and aware I can create my own paradise. When I am making photographs, I am totally immersed in what I am doing. Thoughts fall away, minor discomforts fade into the background, and all I experience is beauty.
The practice of meditation helps me by reminding me that my mind is like a monkey, always reaching for the next distraction or escape or interesting tidbit, but below the surface of monkey mind lies a deep pool of stillness that is always there, whether I am aware of it or not.
I’m still not very good at accepting discomfort and uncomfortable feelings. My instinct is still to find a way out, fast. But I am learning what my patterns of escape are, and working with them. Maybe someday I’ll be as skillful as Akiko, who always answers, when someone asks her how she is, “I’m breathing baby, I’m breathing. That’s all there is.”
So, I keep on breathing, I keep on being, I keep on learning. What else is there?
Tiny gecko likes my soup lid
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